According to Anna Marie Tendler, it's been a hard year.
The artist reflected on the challenges and changes of the past several months in a lengthy Instagram post on New Year's Eve.
Tendler, who revealed in May that then-husband John Mulaney "decided to end our marriage," shared how she's coping and healing during a time of "grief" and "trauma" for many.
She began by discussing the "unfathomable" losses of the last two years, seemingly referring to the coronavirus pandemic, saying that there is no "normal" to go "back" to anymore.
"My own brain is well acquainted with the elusiveness of hope that materializes in sporadic and ephemeral waves," she shared. "I suppose, in part, this is what it means to live with depression and anxiety."
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Tendler, 36, believes that "melancholia" is "amplified by circumstance" and "the circumstances of my year have been harsh and punishing," she said, without mentioning her ex specifically.
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"I find myself asking, 'when will I feel normal?' but in reality I recognize that the normal from before has expired; 'normal' is an impossibility, there is only 'new,'" wrote Tendler, who tied the knot with Mulaney in 2014.
"So how does one digest grief? How do we metabolize trauma, collective and individual?" she went on. "How, precisely, do we sit with, in order to move through? We call our friends; we allow ourselves to laugh. We cry in parked cars. We work; we rest. We throw plates just to watch them break; we make things with our hands. We write, we read, we watch movies. We listen to music. We run, or walk, or sprint, or dance. We ask for help or learn to ask for help. We love or learn to love again."
The fashion and textile history expert then toasted to "all the things we did this year to cope" and to "all we will do next year to heal."
Tendler added, "here we all are, surviving and creating and laughing at tik tok videos. So long 2021. For better or worse I will carry a piece of you with me forever."
She later shared celebratory photos on her Instagram Story of her New Year's Eve festivities, including a "kiss" at midnight from one adorable dog.
Meanwhile, her ex Mulaney marked the holiday season by spending time with partner Olivia Munn, their newborn son Malcom and her family. Munn shared photos of her mom making Banh bao (stuffed buns) and called her baby boy "adora-bao."
